"Mrs Roberts, are you trying to seduce me?"

My only hope is that this story leads to the destruction of the dishonest business built by Oral Roberts on the backs of little old ladies handing over their last two dollars. Oral's son, Richard, is proving himself a chip off the old block, though not as slick as his father. It seems Richard is facing a lawsuit alleging misuse of Oral Roberts University funds. But it wasn't only Richard misusing funds, it seems his wife was busy spending money on "extracurricular activities."

She is accused of dropping tens of thousands of dollars on clothes, awarding nonacademic scholarships to friends of her children and sending scores of text messages on university-issued cell phones to people described in the lawsuit as "underage males."
- A longtime maintenance employee was fired so that an underage male friend of Mrs. Roberts could have his position.
- Mrs. Roberts - who is a member of the board of regents and is referred to as ORU's "first lady" on the university's Web site - frequently had cell-phone bills of more than $800 per month, with hundreds of text messages sent between 1 a.m. to 3 a.m. to "underage males who had been provided phones at university expense."

Underage males? Hmmm. Was she counseling troubled boys struggling with their budding sexualities? Perhaps she was saving them from the evils of "homosexuality?" More things Mrs. Roberts and her husband are accused of....

- Mrs. Roberts spent more than $39,000 at one Chico's clothing store alone in less than a year, and had other accounts in Texas and California. She also repeatedly said, "As long as I wear it once on TV, we can charge it off." The document cites inconsistencies in clothing purchases and actual usage on TV.
- Mrs. Roberts was given a white Lexus SUV and a red Mercedes convertible by ministry donors.
- University and ministry employees are regularly summoned to the Roberts' home to do the daughters' homework.
- The university and ministry maintain a stable of horses for exclusive use by the Roberts' children.
- The Roberts' home has been remodeled 11 times in the past 14 years.

Tsk. Tsk. Oral Roberts claimed that Jesus spoke to him and told him to build the university. Richard Roberts now claims to receive messages from Jesus.

As Max Von Sydow said in Woody Allen's "Hannah and her Sisters,"....
"If Jesus came back and saw what's going on in His name, He'd never stop throwing up."